Tonight before bed, Max remembered that tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day and this wave of excitement rushed over him as he shouted, "I WONDER WHAT KIND OF MISCHIEF PATTY IS GOING TO CREATE IN OUR HOUSE TONIGHT?!? I CAN HARDLY WAIT! LAST YEAR IN PRESCHOOL HE MOVED ALL KINDS OF THINGS AROUND AND LEFT GOLD NUGGETS!!!!
Last year his teacher was apparently very into St. Patrick's Day.
So then I start thinking... shit... if it's not Santa Claus... it's the Tooth Fairy.... or the Easter Bunny... and now... it's Patty... do I shut this thing down right now... or start spray painting rocks and squirting green dye in the toilet bowls?!?
I am already beyond exhausted from being the Tooth Fairy (he lost his other front tooth last night)... and not because I was up in the middle of the night exchanging teeth for money... it's because... let's say... slow.
I had this great idea to give him $2 for his 2nd tooth... thinking that would be neat to give him the dollar amount for whatever number tooth it was... and with 20 teeth to come out that's only $20, right? I immediately made the exchange after he fell asleep... all proud of myself.
Then when Alex woke me at 2am to sleep with her, I suddenly realized that it actually comes to WAY more than $20 if you follow that formula. I was awake for the rest of the night trying to come up with THAT mathematical formula. I couldn't do it. I just became more and more frustrated... and awake. I couldn't let it go. I still can't figure it out.
I clearly should not be handling this Tooth Fairy business. But I'll give this naughty, little Leprechaun Thing a try. If you're going to be a moron, I guess you should at least be a fun one...
I'm looking forward to it.
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