Barefoot Bliss

The other day I was outside with Alex repotting tomato plants. She saw all of the worms in the compost I was using and became so excited. She loves worms. She loves to hold them... and hug them... and kiss them... and talk very softly to them. She'll even carry them around for hours - showing them different things in the yard.

So I gave her two. She wanted a big one and a baby one. "Hi, Sweeties," she said. They sat very still in her tiny hand. "Mommy, why are they not moving?" Maybe they're sleeping. "Yes, I think they are," she whispered.

Standing in the sunlight - wind gusts blowing her golden hair around - she cradled the worms in her hands, rocked them slightly, and started to sing to them - in her most beautiful, gentle, soothing voice - Frere Jacques.

Then she delicately placed them back in the dirt.

Playing With Toys In Every Other Way Than The Way They Were Intended

I think Max is ready to start climbing... or at least he's ready to learn how to not kill himself. This morning he took the jump rope and tied one end around his waist (with a pretty good knot I have to admit) and then proceeded to tie the other end of the rope around the top of the banister (a sort of self belay set-up) to lower himself down the stairs. When I told him that wasn't a good idea, he just huffed, rolled his eyes at the "not safe" part, and went outside and did the same thing on his play set... and ended up dangling in mid-air! He started yelling for help - and this is the scary part - there is always a scary part with Max: he was yelling because the sprinklers were on and he knew the next zone was about to pop up underneath him; not because he happened to be trapped, hanging high above the ground. That was the part he liked!

Toys Are Such a Waste of Money

This contraption on Max's dresser, made of rubber bands we find out by the common mail boxes and hangers from new clothes, is their most favorite toy as of late. Max strums and plucks away while Alex sings extemporaneous songs in her super high singing voice... "Sometimes - when I go into the bathroom - I have to hold my nose - because it stinks - because Mommy pooped. It is very, very stinky - oh so very stinky - when Mommy poops."

Sheer genius.

I can't complain. Really. They'll play like that - without fighting - for a LONG time.

Mommy, WE REALLY NEED THIS!

Max loves to watch TV. He would spend hours and hours in front of it if I let him. Since he has been able to read the guide he has realized that there's not just ONE show on at a time - Quite the revelation! - So lately his favorite part about the whole TV experience is being able to use the remote to flip through all of the shows he likes and watch them simultaneously. This is a sure way to cause Alex to completely lose her shit - she'll be happily enjoying a show and then, suddenly, he changes the channel!!! Enraged screaming ensues. I feel for her - I can completely relate. I'm sure there's a genetic link between remote control usage and the Y chromosome.

But I digress. Along with all of the TV shows, obviously, come the commercials. I can pretty much tell you which ones he sees because he relates them to me almost verbatim. A few months ago, he kept telling me we needed Vonage : "Because you get more for less! It's only $9.95 a month for the first 3 months and then only $24.99 after that. You get to keep your existing phone number AND there's NO ACTIVATION FEE! Mommy, we should really get this." Then it was Aqua Globes: "They can water your plants AUTOMATICALLY for up to 2 weeks. They can water the plants while we are on vacation! They have a beautiful hand-blown design and you can buy four for ONLY $14.99!!!!" After that came the Topsy-Turvy tomato plants: "MOM, we should buy this! Water flows from the ROOTS to the FRUITS! and you can pick them without bending over and all of that backbreaking work!" Most recently it's the Touch-N-Brush. I hear about it whenever we brush his teeth: "Mommy, it uses a vacuum force to dispense the perfect amount of toothpaste every time. If we got it there would be no more messy, sticky bathroom sinks, no more fighting for the last drop of toothpaste, and no more crusty toothpaste tubes. You just press it on with suction cups, insert any kind of toothpaste tube, and then slide on the cover... AND... it's only $19.99!"

You know, I have to humbly admit, I actually considered getting the Touch-N-Brush... thinking that it might make them excited to brush their teeth... and it would help them do it independently... and that would be a good thing... right?! Then, thankfully, I had a realistic vision of Max and Alex with it. We were washing our hands in a public bathroom. Max was getting some foamy soap and he said, "HEY, MOMMY, THIS IS JUST LIKE THE TOUCH-N-BRUSH!" Then he kept pressing it - and pressing it - and pressing it - until there was this huge pile of foam his hands... so much that it was starting to drip on the floor and all over the sink - and then - since some dropped out of his hands he kept pressing for more. Alex was, of course, doing exactly the same thing. There was foamy soap everywhere.

Conclusion: In our house, a tube of toothpaste in a Touch-N-Brush would last about a day. Um. Ya. NO, we don't really need that, Max.

I love waking up to snow

... even in April.

Park that Daddy Knows

The other day Max wanted to go to a certain park, but we had never given that park a name... like Red Park, Orange Park, Snow Park, Spinning Park, Pirate Ship Park... so I was having a hard time figuring out which one he was talking about. All he could tell me was that it had an orange digger, a red, blue, and green sign, and he said "I went to it when I was a baby - when I was 3." I could only think of two parks that had diggers, but he was sure those weren't right. He started to get really frustrated and gave me another hint, "it's in Colorado!" ... as in, if you can't think if it now... well, then... And I couldn't. "I'm sorry, Max. I can't think of any others that fit your description." Silence. Then he says with complete and utter disdain, "I WISH DADDY WAS HERE. HE WOULD KNOW WHAT I WAS SAYING!"

Seriously? After all of the pink milk I've made for that boy! Actually, I knew this day was coming. But I thought I had a few more years before the contempt began. What's really sad is that he was right. Dan figured it out that night. He remembered the park near my old apartment in Denver... with an orange digger... and the sign. We've been to it two times and I think the last time was when he was 3.

Dear Max,
In my cognitively impaired defense, Daddy is the one who's had sleep in the past five years... and I'm not complaining about that one bit... really I'm not. That's more time I've had hugging and kissing and snuggling with you... and listening to you tell me how much you love me. You're growing up so fast though; I don't know how much longer I'll have that kind of closeness with you. When you say certain things to me these days, I realize you're no longer a little, toddler boy. You're a boy who rides around on his bike with all of his neighborhood friends, who shakes peoples hands and says, "Nice to meet you!", who has such confidence that he can walk into a room full of people and say, "HELLO EVERYONE!" , and, like most other boys you think saying POOPY HEAD is the funniest thing in the world. You drive me crazy sometimes - I love you too!!!

April Snowstorm

Max went out first to play. He ended up making a ramp off of the end of the slide. It was so fast - and really launched them forward into the snow. They loved it! Because at our house super fun = super dangerous!