Max loves to watch TV. He would spend hours and hours in front of it if I let him. Since he has been able to read the guide he has realized that there's not just ONE show on at a time - Quite the revelation! - So lately his favorite part about the whole TV experience is being able to use the remote to flip through all of the shows he likes and watch them simultaneously. This is a sure way to cause Alex to completely lose her shit - she'll be happily enjoying a show and then, suddenly, he changes the channel!!! Enraged screaming ensues. I feel for her - I can completely relate. I'm sure there's a genetic link between remote control usage and the Y chromosome.
But I digress. Along with all of the TV shows, obviously, come the commercials. I can pretty much tell you which ones he sees because he relates them to me almost verbatim. A few months ago, he kept telling me we needed Vonage : "Because you get more for less! It's only $9.95 a month for the first 3 months and then only $24.99 after that. You get to keep your existing phone number AND there's NO ACTIVATION FEE! Mommy, we should really get this." Then it was Aqua Globes: "They can water your plants AUTOMATICALLY for up to 2 weeks. They can water the plants while we are on vacation! They have a beautiful hand-blown design and you can buy four for ONLY $14.99!!!!" After that came the Topsy-Turvy tomato plants: "MOM, we should buy this! Water flows from the ROOTS to the FRUITS! and you can pick them without bending over and all of that backbreaking work!" Most recently it's the Touch-N-Brush. I hear about it whenever we brush his teeth: "Mommy, it uses a vacuum force to dispense the perfect amount of toothpaste every time. If we got it there would be no more messy, sticky bathroom sinks, no more fighting for the last drop of toothpaste, and no more crusty toothpaste tubes. You just press it on with suction cups, insert any kind of toothpaste tube, and then slide on the cover... AND... it's only $19.99!"
You know, I have to humbly admit, I actually considered getting the Touch-N-Brush... thinking that it might make them excited to brush their teeth... and it would help them do it independently... and that would be a good thing... right?! Then, thankfully, I had a realistic vision of Max and Alex with it. We were washing our hands in a public bathroom. Max was getting some foamy soap and he said, "HEY, MOMMY, THIS IS JUST LIKE THE TOUCH-N-BRUSH!" Then he kept pressing it - and pressing it - and pressing it - until there was this huge pile of foam his hands... so much that it was starting to drip on the floor and all over the sink - and then - since some dropped out of his hands he kept pressing for more. Alex was, of course, doing exactly the same thing. There was foamy soap everywhere.
Conclusion: In our house, a tube of toothpaste in a Touch-N-Brush would last about a day. Um. Ya. NO, we don't really need that, Max.
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