La La

Alex loves to watch and feed the fish when Max is in school. She stands there saying, "HI FISH! HI! Hi Fish!" and then listens for them to respond. She really loves animals...especially dogs!

The other day when I was putting Alex down for her nap, she started singing the ABC's to herself. It sounds something like:
a b c d _ f g _ i _ k _ _ m n O P _ r s _ _ v W _ Y Z. Noooooowwww _ _ my bc's ne na nuh _ sing _ me! YAY! (clap, clap, clap) YAY ME! She sang the song three times. Most of her letters are pretty clear and she carries the tune really well. After each song she clapped for herself at the end and then said, "Yay me!" She says, "Yay me!" a lot when she does something she's proud of. I think it's perfect. I should definitely say that to myself more.

I just cut her hair last week. For the most part she sat there so still for me and was very cooperative. At one point she even looked in the mirror and said, "Mommy cut. Like it!" I told her I thought it looked cute so she looked at herself in the mirror again, smiled and said, "Ya, cute!" Words cannot even describe how this hair cutting experience with her differs from the ones I have with Max...

When you point to the color orange and ask her the color she says, "Max." When you point to the color red and ask her the color she says, "Mine."

She refers to herself as La La. For the longest time we didn't know what she was talking about until one day we asked her what her name was and she very clearly said, "LA LA!" She thinks it's really funny when we call her that.

We went up skiing on Sunday. Max did really well on his little skis. He got some good gliding in and is getting a lot better at getting up by himself when he falls. He INSISTS on using his poles and actually does amazingly well with them.

Hey, You Live on the Planet Earth!

We have been reading about the solar system lately. Max likes to tell people he meets (especially other kids at the park) that they live on planet Earth. He has yet to meet an equally enthusiastic audience...

except Alex...she's always fascinated by everything he says. She copies everything he does these days...sometimes every minute mannerism and word. She's constantly saying, "Me too, me too!" Alex wants to be like Max so badly she doesn't like to admit she's a girl though she'll settle for Tom-Boy-Girl. We've been reading 'Girls Hold Up This World' to her - she really likes all of the pictures...she doesn't realize it yet, but her girl power is strong.

Max has a fish tank in his bedroom now with 2 orange and black fish (they're tropical but I forget what kind). I think he sleeps better knowing he's not entirely alone. I seriously considered getting him a dog, but with our luck it would just end up wanting to sleep with me or Dan as well. Anyway, he loves his fish and he loves helping me clean the tank more than anything. In this area he actually is a help. He can catch the fish in the net so much better than I can...so much better that I don't even want to clean the tank without his help. He's like a little fish whisperer the way he goes about it. He just holds the net in the water and waits...he keeps it very still...and he WAITS until the fish eventually swims in and then he pulls the net up. He talks to them very softly and calmly the whole time. It's the only time you will ever see this child that motionless and quiet.

I have a confession. I enjoy watching other kids throw tantrums in public. It's not that I wish tantrums upon other parents; it's just that it's so reassuring to know that I'm not alone and that those embarrassing fits are not a measure or indication of my abilities. You can avoid certain situations and mitigate circumstances as much as possible, but kids are kids and it's perfectly normal for them to fall apart sometimes. However, with society's general discouragement of meltdowns it's easy to feel like a bad mother when they happen. No matter how well you deal with them, your children inevitably cause a scene and you can instantly feel the judgmental eyes upon you. Usually mine are the ones falling apart, but there has recently been some realignment in the universe and I get to watch other kids fall to pieces while mine hop along happily. To whom ever is responsible: THANK YOU.

I also have an announcement. I have discovered the reason Max likes me to park on the left side of the parking lot at preschool. Brooke's mom always parks on the left side. He really likes Brooke. Apparently Brooke (who turns 5 next week) considers him her boyfriend and according to their teachers, they like to do everything together at school. They especially like to race each other out to the cars when we pick them up...

Things I Have Learned in the Past Week

It is extremely painful to step on marbles while barefoot.

Stepping on a cheap string of plastic Mardi Gras beads with your shoes on will gouge your wood floor 100 times deeper than dropping James (made of heavy metal - no pun intended) in the same spot 10 times.

Pickled zucchini slices are actually very tasty!

If I park on the left side of the parking lot when picking Max up from preschool, there is no problem. If, however, there are no spaces available on the left and I am forced to park on the right; he will lose his shit faster than a baby with diarrhea and I will have to endure a full-on kicking, screaming, hitting, crying you-name-it tantrum for at least half an hour thereafter. I still have no idea why...

Alex can almost count to ten. She does 1,2,3 then skips a few and finishes with 8, 9, and 10. She is also starting to sing along when we sing songs and she does most of the hand movements as well. She really likes 5 Little Ducks and Drip Drop, Drip Drop, See the Falling Rain.

The other day Alex was playing quietly in her room and when I went to check on her I found her singing The Wheels on the Bus to one of her dolls ... she was doing all of the movements with the doll that I do with her ... she was really mad when she saw me and told me NO, Mommy - so I left ... standing outside the doorway I heard her start singing again. Her sweet little voice...

Max has figured out that he can climb up the kitchen cabinets to get at the chocolate stash. I know this because he always slams the doors closed before climbing down.

Alex likes to sneak up on me. It doesn't matter what I'm doing: working on the computer, cooking, folding laundry ... she'll just stand there super quietly and watch. I have to pretend I don't see her until she comes up to me ... she doesn't like it when I find her...

My son loves to replace the toilet paper rolls and he almost always puts the seat back down ... he definitely has potential...

Down on The Man

This past month with Max has been a (deep breath) particularly rough one. He's been sick a lot and has, since his birthday, acquired one hell of a foul mood. I think it's going to be another rough YEAR. At the beginning of year number 4, I was thinking I had survived some of the worst of it for a while and that things were sure to be smooth sailing for a bit...at least, right?! I always have been somewhat of a moron.

There I was decorating the dining room on his birthday with balloons and streamers when he walked in to ask me what I was doing. I told him I was decorating the room to make it special for him while we ate his special sushi dinner and chocolate cake for dessert and he said, "Well, I don't like it, Mommy. You should take it down. I don't like it. I don't want it special. I just want balloons that I can play with (balloons that haven't been tied-so you can blow them up over and over again and watch them fly around the room when you let the air out-of course I had tied them all). You shouldn't have done this, Mommy." He proceeded to throw up his special birthday dinner and cake that night and I chalked his comments up to his not feeling very well.

His crushing comments like that have lingered long beyond his illnesses. Part of it is just his natural temperament. He's extremely sensitive, perceptive, serious and analytical. Some might even say critical. He usually has a strong reaction to anything new. He's his father's son. He is brutally honest. But it's his increasing defiance these days that has me at a complete loss. And by loss I mean a loss for wise, mature, adult-like reactions from me. The child in me knows exactly what to say...but sadly, it's nothing I'd want my child repeating...
For instance...

When you tell him your plan for the day. He says, "Oh, Man. I don't want to do that. That's not my plan, Mommy. I want a different plan. I want to go swimming. (All he wants to do is swim now since he has started swimming underwater.)" We can go swimming after we do those other things...and he says, "Awe, NO WAY! That's not my plan. I don't want to do it later." Max, get dressed!!!!! "Oh, Man. I just want to go swimming.".....

When you tell him to take his shoes off ... or basically anything he doesn't want to do...especially brush his teeth... he says, "No, Mommy. It doesn't care, Mommy! (it doesn't matter)." Oh, it cares, Max. You're climbing all over the couch. Take your shoes off, please. "OH, MAN. I just don't want to do that!"

When you tell him what you're making for dinner he says (even if he has really liked it in the past), "Oh, Man. I just don't want that, Mommy. That's not what I wanted for dinner. I don't like that, Mommy! I'm not eating that."

When you tell him it's time to turn the TV off because he's already watched something like 13 shows (This was when Alex was sick and she was glued to me.) he says, "NO, Mom! Diego is on next!" You've already seen it 3 times today! And then I break into song: Ahhhh, Rescue Pack...Comin' to the Rescue...nothing pisses him off more than having to listen to me sing. I can't blame him. I turn the TV off and offer to play a game. "Oh, MAN!!! I said I just want to watch Go-Diego-Go again! I just want to! I don't like what you just did, Mom! I don't like you turning the TV off like that!"

Then there's yesterday. I was making sugar cookies and he wanted to help eat the cookie dough. I let him have some tastes. When he wanted more and I told him no he lost it. "I hate you, Mommy. Mommy, I hate you. Mommy, I don't like doing things with you. I hate you, Mommy." I told him I was really sorry that he felt that way and I was sorry I couldn't let him eat more cookie dough. He just went on and on. "I just hate you, Mommy." Listening to those words, part of me just ached inside ... for me and for him. The other part tried to remain calmly detached ... trusting the process. (It is actually amazing how detached parents have to be at times to retain the right rational and perspective.) Then I thought ... where did he learn this? We don't ever talk like that?! At any rate, after about 10 minutes he came back into the kitchen and was quite lovely ... as if nothing had happened at all...

Ahhhhh...at least I know my son doesn't have a problem expressing his feelings.

Maxs' Play Plans

Max makes these in preschool. Every morning he chooses a specific area to play in and decides what he wants to do there. Then, on a play plan sheet, he writes his own name, draws a picture of what he plans to do, and draws lines for each word in the sentence that describes his purpose.

I find these fascinating. He's not much of a painter or drawer so I love these little glimpses of his self expression on paper. I especially like seeing his self portraits evolve.