Wordless Wednesday

If I Could Just...

finish something ... a sentence, my thoughts, the laundry ... a blog post...

I think I've had a lot to blog about, but can't ever seem to get beyond a few sentences. Perhaps there's not much more to say than this :

I feel less and less like a mother these days and more and more like a referee or prison guard.

Motherhood is torture.  Even the most amazingly beautiful moments hurt you like hell.

One morning Max helped Alex put her shoes on and then he said to her, "There, Alex! See, you don't need Mommy anymore.  You have me."

Alex turned two just before Thanksgiving.  She stopped nursing about a week before and also showed glimpses of potty training. I was so happy for her progress and so sad that I no longer have a baby.

This is how my son helps me bake and cook:  He stands on the stool next to me shouting, "Mommy, what are you doing?" every five seconds - and then, "WHY?" after every answer and then "WHY?" a couple of more times.  During the inquiry, he proceeds to hang all of measuring cups from his ears, stick whatever he can on his fingers and tongue, wear the bowls, strainers, tongs (you name it) on his head, and tuck the rolling pin between his legs.  Then he spends the remaining time jumping up and down doing the 'I have to pee, but I'm not gonna' dance while giggling and trying to keep it all on.... I can't help but think, this could explain a lot...

This morning I went jogging on the river path near our house like I try to do everyday. I love this path. It has dense woods, wildlife (foxes, beavers, eagles, kingfishers, blue heron, and even pelicans), the constant sound of running water, and since it's in the middle of the city, unfortunately some graffiti. Max and Alex were riding in the jogger...kickin' back...when all of the sudden Max spotted the spray paint. "Look, Mommy," he shouted, "someone drew a nice picture for us!" "That was so nice of them!" All I had the breathe for was, "Ya, I guess so." "Ya, Mommy, I really like it."

Ever Wonder What Max Is Doing While I'm Blogging?

This is what the inside of a SuperSac looks like. If I told you how quiet the house was... you'd just call me an idiot.

A New Era Begins

As I was laying on the ground today at the park, looking up at the golden sunlight filtering through the trees, Max came by and sat on my stomach. Then he shot me a concentrated look and proceeded to fart! He tried to fight it, but he was so pleased with himself that he had to smile...and then this..."Why are you laughing, Mommy - what's so funny?"

So there you have it...the art of farting for comedy begins at age 3!

I am, of course, as I have been since giving birth for the first time, both strangely proud and slightly horrified.

And for those of you thinking of Alex...poor poor Alex. What will she endure with that brother of hers? The minute Max planted his ass on my stomach, Alex maneuvered a not-so-graceful landing on my face. If not for a lack of muscle control she would have been right there with him I'm sure.

"Mommy, I Have To Tell You Something!"

EARLY MORNING CHAT WHILE WE GRIND COFFEE
"Mommy, I have to tell you something. Um, um...a square...has four sides." That's right, Max. "And a circle doesn't have any sides...and it can roll."
"Um, Mommy, I have to tell you something." What. "Um, you know what melts?...ice cream melts!...and also butter." It sure does.
"Um, Mommy, I have to tell you something else. Um, um, um...what eats bananas?" I don't know. What? "Monkeys, silly!" Oh, yes, I think they do!!!

CAR RIDE
"Mommy, what's 2+2?" Count my fingers...4. YEP.
"Mommy, what's 4+4?" That's 8...counting my fingers again. YAY!
"Mommy, what's 4+8?" 12.
"Mommy, what's 4+4+8+8?" Um, 24. YAY! "You're so smart, Mommy!"
"YA!" seconds Alex.
I'm glad we have a few years before integrals.

WALK FROM CAR TO PRESCHOOL
"Mommy, what are they (construction) doing?"
They're getting ready to make a new playground and parking lot.
"WHY?"
"The new school needs them."
"Oh...what is this (small bulldozer)?"
"Why aren't they using it?"
"I'm not sure. They must not need it right now."
"But why?"
"I don't know, Max."
"But why, Mommy?"
"Maybe they need to dig bigger holes."
"WHY?"
"They need to lay really big pipes."
"Why?"
"You know, actually, I think it's just broken."
"Ya, I think it's broken. They can't use it. Let's go, Mom! We're late!!!"

DISCUSSION IN THE JOGGER
"Alex, do you know what it is now? It's Fall!"
"YA!"
"And that's when the leaves turn lots of different colors. See?"
"YA!"
"And then, sometimes, the wind blows the leaves OFF the trees and they fall to the ground and then they turn into even more colors!"
"YA!"
"Ya, that's what it is!"
"YA!"
"Alex, do you like your lollipop! Is it yummy?"
"YA!"
"Alex, do you want to trade?"
"NO!"

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