X-country Skiing with a 3 and 5 Year Old

The 1000 words... or so : Dan leaves for his turn to skate. Off we go - the three of us - shuffle, shuffle, shuffle. Max quickly realizes that he really likes to fall and flail about in the snow with his skis in the air - LOOK MOM, I'M A HELICOPTER! I plea for him to get back up (the correct way - yes, Max requires specification). Alex stops shuffling and insists that I take her gloves off so she can use Max's poles. I insist that she keep them on and she immediately drops to the snow in a crying fit. Max is back to making helicopter motions and noises. I help Alex up and take the gloves off. She shuffles away - yelling at me to not look at her. I make more pleas for Max to get up. He finally does so and actually begins to ski while trying to catch up to Alex. NICE JOB, MAX! Down he goes. Down Alex goes. Her hands get cold. She starts to cry. I pick her up and start skiing with her. Max gets up slowly and this time realizes that he can ski bent over with his hands resting on the tips of his skis. Alex is dying to try that. She screams at me to let her down. Now they are both bent over and, basically, skiing on their hands. It's actually an even slower motion than you might think. At least 50 people pass by - and enjoy the free spectacle that is my children on skis - most make a comment about my stupidity bravery. YOU HAVE NO IDEA, PEOPLE! An hour goes by and we finally make it around the quarter-mile-loop. Max yells out WHOO-HOO! THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN!!! Alex agrees. Our tour was a raging success.